Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
