Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
