"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
