Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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