I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
