So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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