so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
How's work?
Spinning.
You took a bar mat shot.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize