i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
