I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
