That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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