you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
