Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
