I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
