Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
