i would punch a child for taco bell
Small penises have feelings too.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
