They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
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