hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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