Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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