I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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