also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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