woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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