I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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