he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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