You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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