And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
