Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
