1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
