covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
