All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
