did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
