im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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