i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize