i need an iv and a liver transplant
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
