Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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