He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I just gift wrapped bread.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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