We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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