she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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