I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
