I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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