Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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