I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Randomize
