Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
