Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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