I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
