i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
