so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
