If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
