we have pet lesbian snakes
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
