doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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