She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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