yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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